Wide Awake and Dreaming
by lonerlullaby
Summary: This is a story where Alice is the human and Jasper is the lone vampire. But for what reasons did she come to Forks? And what happened in the past? Cannon pairings, same powers. Please read.
1. Hey Camilla

**Chapter One: Hey Camilla**

How could she do this to me, to my dad? I knew she'd already given up completely on him, no matter what she said to convince me otherwise. And it had only been a year! There was still hope, there was _always_ hope, but she wouldn't call off the wedding, even when I told her to. I'll never be able to forgive her for this, _never_. Her and my 'new father'? They're dead to me.

I even told her about my dreams, or nightmares, or whatever they were.. They were all the same, almost exactly. I always saw my father, the real one, not the fake jerk my mom was so attached to. First, I can hear him scream. It's a horrible sound. You're dad is supposed to be the strong one, the guy who doesn't cry or, well, let out blood-curdling screeches. So the scream makes me think it's a nightmare. But then I see him running, so fast, quicker than a lightning bolt strikes the ground. It seems to me like he's chasing something, but I can never see what, not that it matters at all. What matters is that he's alive. You can't chase something if you're dead. They can't be nightmares, because they're trying to tell me something: that my dad is still out there. I'm sure of it.

She'd just stared at me with those big eyes that I could read like an open book, but now they were filled with some emotion that I couldn't place. It could have been hate for bringing up her painful past, or maybe shame for acting like I was crazy. 'Stop', she'd said. I was just tired, the city fumes were going to my head, I didn't know what I was talking about. _Yes_, I was tired, but only because of the very real dreams that I kept having! She'd told me to go back to bed and get well rested for the wedding that was going to happen in the morning, whether I liked it or not, though not in so many words. So I did. I'd always been an obedient kid, something that I was adding to my list of annoying qualities at the moment.

As I laid there in bed, I reached for my locket. It had a picture of my real dad in it. The one who had been there for every one of my birthdays, who'd helped me up when I fell off my bike the first time I'd ridden it, kissing my scuffed and bleeding knee to make the pain go away. He was the one that was there for me, always, even if he couldn't be now. And I wasn't about to give up on him like my mom already had. I wasn't going to find some replacement that we both knew wasn't even half as good. My father was out there, somewhere, and I would find him if it took me the rest of my life.

But there wasn't anything I could do to change my mom's mind. Some delusional part of her still thought I would grow to love her dear Benjamin, that after a while I'd treat him like he was my real father, not some substitute. If she could make up her mind, though, so could I. She wanted to be with him, I didn't. Even if it meant hurting my mother, there was no way I was going to betray my dad. So she'd have to choose.

Oh, but she couldn't pick between us! The fact that she'd even have to give a thought to whether she'd rather have her daughter, the one who'd been through everything with her, or her fiance of six months; that she'd consider replacing my dad and sending away her only child, it was insulting. I'd been there when he'd gone missing, I'd wiped her tears and held her while she cried, just as she'd done to me. And she was thinking of shoving me off onto some other person? I couldn't believe it.

So I made the decision for her. I walked up to the phone and dialed the number that belonged to my aunt, waiting impatiently for her to pick up. I heard her soft 'Hello?' after three long rings. To be honest, I missed my aunt a lot. Before, I'd go up every summer to visit her. She was on my dad's side of the family, his sister, so after his disappearance our family didn't talk to her nearly as much, like my mom was trying to burn all bridges that led to him.

I tried to conjure up the right words in my head. I didn't want to sound pushy or anything, seeing as I was pretty much inviting myself to live with her. After a moment, I settled on, "Hey, aunt Camilla. What's going on in small town Forks?" And that - those ten, seemingly insignificant words - started it all.

Now I'm sitting in the uncomfortable yet somehow soothing seat of an airplane, flipping a tiny packet of peanuts over in my hand and staring out the window at the sea of clouds beneath me. I'd been happy to skip my mom's mistake of a wedding, which aunt Camilla wasn't invited to, of course. They'd never really gotten along very well. But I loved her, she was my favorite member of my screwed up family.

Her and I look quite a bit alike as well. She's about five three, which is almost two full inches taller than me, but I've always been the shortest in my family. In fact, I'm usually the shortest one in the entire city. Smiling bitterly at the thought, I saw the faint reflection of my short, deep black hair that contrasted with my pale face, like the darkest night of a snowy winter. I think I got that from her, as well, if it even works that way. We've got different hair cuts, though: hers is long and beautiful, touching just about her waist, like Rapunzel or something. The last time I'd seen her she was so thin and small that she looked like my sister, not my aunt. It would be easy to mistake her for a teenager, if you didn't get a good look at her. In fact, the only way you could really tell that she wasn't was through her eyes.

They're a deep muddy brown, sometimes they even look black when the light hits them right. You can see plainly that they're full of wisdom and compassion. When you get a good view of them, you don't see some ignorant teenager, filled with arrogance, like they're invincible; you see a friend, someone who would never mean to hurt you, no matter who you are or how well you know her. Someone who's been through enough to make her as wise as an old woman. A couple people have said that I was fortunate enough to get my eyes from her, but I don't think they know the half of what they're saying.

Hers are full of experience and knowledge, only acquired over a few short years, but still more so than some of the oldest women. Mine, on the other hand, are full of deprivation and doubt, two things that wouldn't leave them no matter how hard I tried. They probably don't read into as much as I do, they just mean that she's got large, almond-shaped brown eyes, and I do too. Like I said, they don't know the half of it.

I watched the clouds ripple under me, like frothy white waves - we were too high up to actually see the ground that was so far below - when I a flight attendant's scratchy voice over the speaker, "Folks, we're nearing Forks, local time two fifteen in the afternoon, so the captain is requesting that you make sure your seatbelts are fastened and your seat is leaned all the way forward. Now is the time to turn all electronic devices off. I would like to thank you for flying on American Airlines, and have a nice day."

Why do all flight attendants always sound so happy? It's a little bit creepy, if you ask me, although I guess that's what I used to sound like before.. well, just before. I felt myself jerk forward slightly as the plane tilted down to prepare for landing. I haven't ridden on too many planes before, so this feeling was new to me, and a little bit unnerving. The important thing was, though, that Alice Marie Waters was going home. Not that I've ever lived in Forks before, but as soon as I arrived, I knew I'd be surrounded by people I loved. That's what home is anyways, right?

There was a large bump as we hit the ground, and my ears popped painfully as another flight attendant came on the speaker, "We have arrived in Forks, Washington. Please wait until the plane has come to a complete stop and the seatbelt sign is turned off to get up and get your things. We thank you, once again, for flying with American Airlines." _No,_ I thought happily, _Thank you_.

And thank the Lord and anyone else who would listen. I'm finally here! I get to see my aunt Camilla! I really did miss her like no other, I realized as I yanked my carry on bag out of the compartment, wondering where the rest of my many bags were. Maybe I wasn't as perky and cheerful as before, but nothing could stop my love of shopping and all things fashion. I guess I'd have to wait and get them with aunt Camilla.

As soon as I stepped off the airplane, and walked through the little hallway to the main airport that would make even a normal person feel slightly claustrophobic, with it's flourescent lights and gray walls, and then there she was, waiting for me. "Ca- I mean, aunt Camilla!" I nearly shouted, I was so excited. Oops.. a slip of the tongue. I guess it's just easier to call her Camilla, like she was my friend, not my aunt.

"Alice!!" She yelled back as I ran over to wrap her up in a hug. Her arms folded around me as well, as she said, "Oh, you're just going to love it here," then she pulled me off of her and held me at length, and looked me up and down and into my eyes for a moment, "Wow. You've grown up so fast." There was an emotion in her voice, something I couldn't place, yet again. My people-reading skills were a bit off today, it seemed.

"Not enough.." I grumbled, a little bit frustrated that I was sill only five one. She laughed, and involuntarily, I laughed too. I haven't done that in a long time, since dad disappeared, actually.. The thought cut my laughter of in an instant, but Camilla didn't notice.

She looked at me, her face glowing with happiness, and in a joking tone she said, "So, how many bags did you pack this time?"

* * *

**Hey!! Thank you soooo much for reading this!! I hope you liked it!!! I am also writing another story called Immortal Fire, but I'm kind of at writers block for that one, but I did think of this! It would be really nice of anyone who actually liked this story to go and read my other one...and maybe reveiw and give me ideas? You don't have to, but it would be really helpful! Reveiw this story and tell me the things you liked or hated about it! Thanks!!!**


	2. Serenity in the Middle of Chaos

Chapter Two--Alice's POV

"I really did try to pack light," I said with a light chuckle, "but I just couldn't seem to put anything back in the drawer!" When it came down to it, I was a pack rat; the kind of person who refuses to throw things away and has an aversion to growing out of clothes, although that usually wasn't something I could control. The growing thing, I mean. "I swear, it's like a disease!" It was true. And a contagious one, at that, as my Aunt had it pretty bad as well.

I had only been here for the short time it had taken us to get my (many) suitcases - unpacking was going to take quite a bit of effort - and get out to the car, and I was already feeling more at home than I had in a long time, even when I was in my own house. Being with Aunt Camillia seemed to take me out of the current situation I'd been forced into, and put me back where I belonged: the old times, far away from all the hurt and frustration the events since Dad had caused. Camilla truly was my best friend, the only person I could think of that could cheer me up no matter what.. But nothing lasts forever, right?

"Yeah, yeah, I know." Her smile was bright, "It seems to run in the family, doesn't it? At least I can make money off my splendors." She said, laughing. I recalled the store she owned down in Portland, Aunt Millie's. It was the most adorable little boutique I'd ever seen, opened just a few years after I was born. Whenever we came here, I spent a lot of time being babysat there, while my parents were having a romantic dinner at the only fancy restaurant in the small town, La Bella Italiano. I'd only been there once myself, when my whole family had gone, so I only vaguely remembered it. My mind started to wander, memories of the time I spent with my family running through it much too quickly for my liking. Unexpectedly, my eyes filled with water and a swollen tear escaped, rolling lazily down my cheek. I tried to wipe it away before Camilla saw, and thinking I had succeeded, I started to focus on what she was saying. "I mean, I really have been cutting back on what I've been spending ever since your family moved away.. and.. well, you know.." She let the sentence trail off, as if trying to coax another drop out of my wet eyes, though I knew the last thing she wanted was to see me sad.

"Oh, sweetheart," she murmured, looking at me with large eyes filled with sorrow and memories, "I shouldn't have brought it up," dread started to fill her voice as she added, "well, at least not so soon." She looked so sad, maybe even more than me, which was an accomplishment. She and her brother, my father, had been closer than most siblings. It was wrong of me to make her feel guilty.

I felt bad, like I had to make up for it. In an attempt to smooth things over, I said, "No! Really, I'm fine. I.." I hadn't flown many times in my life, but even I knew, when all else fails: blame the airlines. "I'm just tired from the airplane," it may not have been the complete truth, but the truth hurt, and I wasn't good with pain. Not that kind, anyways. "I feel like I'm covered in a layer of dirt," I chuckled, wiping my eyes one last time to rid them of lingering tears.

"I know exactly how you feel," she said. If she didn't believe me, she was pretending she was, which was good enough for me.. especially since we were now pulling into her driveway, and I could practically hear the shower calling to me. "Sweetie, I see a long, hot shower in your future," she grinned at me, parking the car and hopping out to help me with my bags. As soon as we'd gotten inside, she pointed to the stairs, "I'm sure you remember your old room? Right up there and to the left." I did remember my room. The house was so tiny it would have been impossible to forget. I nodded, looking around and taking in the sight of the house I knew so well. It felt strange to be here again. "Well, no need for any tours, then. And don't worry about your bags, I can handle them. You go clean up."

---

Showers were always my favorite part of the day. The warm droplets pelting against your back, getting to just stand there as the water fell around you, taking your worries with it. Of course, it didn't really erase your problems, but it allowed you to put them aside for a few minutes, let yourself relax. And being clean was always an upside to that.

The moment I twisted the knobs for the water off, though, I felt the world settle heavily upon my shoulders once more. Who was I kidding? My father was missing, and had been for far too long. My mother was moving on too easily, getting married and pretending like he'd never existed. And on top of it all, I had to worry about starting a new school tomorrow, something that I was looking forward to just about as much as speaking to my mother. I had enough problems right now to last me a lifetime, and no amount of warm water and steam could wash them away. I felt like the world was passing me by, but I was frozen in place; a spectator in my own life.

Pushing that unpleasant thought out of my head, I wrapped my towel around me and headed for my room, where I found my suitcases laying next to the far wall, carefully laid out. I unzipped the one nearest to me and carefully shuffled through it until I found what I was looking for: a pair of soft shorts and a tanktop to wear to bed. Unfortunately, I wasn't quite sure I would be able to get to sleep.

Sure, I was exhausted, but there was just so much on my mind that I wasn't sure it would come easily to me, which wasn't a good thing, considering it was my first day of school tomorrow. After changing, I climbed into bed and snuggled under the fluffy comforter. I don't know if it was the good memories that lurked behind these doors, or the familiarity of it all, but surprisingly, I was wrong. Within a few minutes of closing my eyes, I had drifted off into deep unconciousness.

What seemed like minutes later when actually an entire night had gone by, I woke up with a cold sheen of sweat covering my body, fear thicker than blood coursing through my veins. Yet another nightmare had ruined what could have been a perfect night: it was the same vision that I have watched happen so many times before, but this time, right before I jolted awake, I had seen what looked like the eyes of the sun staring back at me. My memory of them was burned into my brain, even stronger than the rest of the vision, though I'd seen it a thousand times and the eyes only once. They were the one piece of serenity in all the chaos, hauntingly beautiful, and I had a feeling they were going to be like an annoying song, stubbornly sticking in my head for the rest of the day.. or until I found out what they meant.

* * *

**I am soooo sorry it took so long to update... I promise I will try to work faster from now on. I want to say a HUGE thank you to my first four reveiwers!! You guys are awesome!!! **


End file.
